i keep trying to blog and i start and i have so much to say i don't know where to start or how to say it and then i hit draft and go away again. part of it is fear too. i think i am…

i am on autopilot a lot. or at least very inside my head. example: patient asked for a koband around his arm to hold his IV in place. i started to wrap it, when the day nurse noticed that the catheter had come completely out.

i use to be a very emotional person. at least i think i was. people who have known me a long time, please report back. now, it seems, i am cold and unfeeling. i hear this from a number of people. apparently, i am good…

and yet when i sit down to write, i can't get it out. i had a good week at work. the nasty nurse was in a good mood and nice to me. i have realized that the way the rest of them deal with it…

i gained about 10 pounds in nursing school. not enough sleep. poor eating habits. stress eating. i have lost those now. and further, i am just not hungry. for instance, today, i have had a plain bagel, half a coffee and a smoothie to eat.